Going with the flow
by Jeanss36
Summary: Santana Lopez auditions for The X Factor and one of the celebrity judges, Brittney S. Pierce, becomes in liking with her.
1. Chapter 1

I gripped the microphone, closed my eyes, and belt out the last note with flying colors. I was even amazed at how incredible it sounded. When the music stopped I opened my eyes, and when the sound of my own beating heart went mute, I gained back my hearing. The whole crowd was going crazy. The lights above me we're so bright, and the judge's faces were priceless. That's when it hit me.

Holy shit.

My heart was beating out of control, my body began to shake, and my hands were getting so sweaty that I gripped the microphone tighter to make sure it didn't slip out.

The crowd was screaming so loud. They were screaming for me.

All I could do was stare out into the huge arena, amazed at what was happening right now. Every person was out of their seats, clapping, pointing, whistling. This is how I've always dreamed it would happen, and it's happening. Fuck all those people that told me it would never happen. It's fucking happening!

I felt my bottom lip quiver, and my vision became blurry. I lifted my right hand over my mouth, shook my head in disbelieve, and closed my eyes. Holy shit this is really happening. The crowd was still cheering for me. I opened my eyes and with the hand I had over my mouth wiped away my tears.

Once I got my vision back I glanced at the judges, who I couldn't believe were really sitting in front of me. Pop sensation, Britney Spears, had her two index fingers in each of her ears trying to make the cheering from the crowd stop. Badass mother fucking, L.A. Reid, was smiling and was pointing at me yelling out, "That's how you do it!" which made me feel super giddy inside. Simon Cowell had his back to me looking at the still standing crowd behind him, and trying to make them to shut up. And last but not least the beautiful, Brittany S. Pierce, was sitting there staring at me, smiling that amazing smile of hers. Her gaze was so intense; I had to break eye contact by looking down to the grown feeling so shocked that she's actually staring at me. This is too much.

Simon turned around to speak in the microphone, looking a little annoyed. It made me come back to reality, remembering I still had to get at least 3 yes's from the judges. My nerves were so out of control. I clasped my hands around the microphone in front of me to avert them from shaking. "Okay, okay, quiet down." He motioned up and down with his hands. Most of the crowd by now was sitting down and starting to quiet down, but were still making some noises. "L.A.?" Simon motioned to him, to give him the go.

I was gripping the microphone so tight, and couldn't stand still. I felt like such a mess. This is it; your dream is in their hands.

L.A. was smiling, shaking his head with his eyes on me. "Wow! Woo! Feisty little fire ball! I'm feeling you, I am so feeling you!" The crowd launched into their cheering's again.

I couldn't believe it. L.A. thinks I'm good! He's feeling me! "Thank you." I laughed in shock.

"Spears?" Simon asked.

I brought my attention to the Queen of Pop, ready to hear what she had to say.

"I was not expecting that. That was absolutely incredible. That was amazing." She nodded. The crowd again went crazy, that I'm sure she didn't get to hear my shy "thank you". I was beyond over the moon. How could this be happening to me?

"Simon?" L.A requested.

Oh gosh, this is it. I've always been so scared of Simon. I've seen the way he could be, he could be a dick.

"Santana let me tell you sweetheart, you are on the money." Simon said with that English accent of his, while pointing his pen at me. I brought both of my hands to my face, not being able to believe what I'm hearing. "Because right now, what is missing on the Pop Charts is something like you, you're different, exciting. I really, really like you." Holy Shit. I have _the_ biggest smile on my face. Simon Cowell likes me. This seriously can't be real. "Really, really like you." He repeated as to confirm my thoughts. I nodded, putting my right hand over my heart. Since I'm sure he wouldn't hear me with all the cheering, I mouthed a thank you to him, which he responded with a thumps up.

"Pierce?" I was so distracted as to know who called out her name. I was in cloud 9, so happy.

I snapped out of my daze and brought my attention to Brittany S. Pierce, who was still staring at me with that intensity in her eyes. She smiled at me and I smiled back. "You know what I find that's really, really interesting? It's that you have such a cute face, you're really likable, and then all of a sudden you're like _I'm on fire_." She finished by sapping her fingers left to right. "Like I couldn't take my eyes off you. You're just mesmerizing. Like I literally wrote down on my notes, hot." She laughed, pointing to her notes in front of her. "You're awesome." The crowd again started cheering. I'm pretty sure my smile couldn't be even bigger as it is right now. I felt my face get super-hot, so I brought my hands up to my face to hide my obvious blush. I mouthed a shy thank you, which she responded by nodding at me, smiling.

"Okay are we voting?" L.A. Reid asked.

"Yeah." An English accent responded.

"Okay well Santana, when you came onto the stage, you had this attitude. And I loved it. You have style, and you have passion, and you have ambition, and I think you have the X Factor sweetheart. So it's a yes from me." L.A. Reid grinned.

I shook my head, with my shaky hands on my face, smiling like never before. "Thank you so much." I breathed out.

"Santana, I think this show needs someone like you, somebody that's prepared to work, and fight, and get there, cause that's what it's all about. And I'm saying a big, big yes." Simon revealed. I dropped my head in disbelieve. I only needed one more yes, and I'll be in.

I looked up to Britney Spears. "I'll definitely say yes." She nodded.

"Oh, my god." I breathed out, placing my hand over my forehead, smiling at the crowd that was going crazy.

"Pierce?"

I gazed at Brittany Pierce. Feeling a little confident I smirked at her, cause even if she said no, I'll still be in.

"You're attitude is awesome. And, I kinda have a girl crush on you." She admitted, laughing at herself. The crowd and the other judges joined as well. I shook my head, laughing in disbelieve. "You have another yes".

I'm in! Holy Shit! What the fuck! I'm fucking in! I'm motha fucking Santana Lopez, and I'm on the X Factor!

The crowd went wild. "Wow, oh my god, thank you so much". I blubbered. They responded with nods. I stared walking backwards; not wanting to leave the people cheering for me, but one of the camera men was signaling me to walk off, so I waved to the judges and turned to walk out. Before I did, I turned back to the crowd, feeling a little charged, and blew them a kiss. I glanced at the judges, and saw Brittany S. Pierce blow me one back. My heart stopped. I smiled and walked off stage.

Once I was out of sight of the judges, there was another camera man waiting for me. I walked down the stairs and found my support team waiting for me, jumping up and down, with huge smiles on their faces.

"You're fucking in!" Puck yelled, running to me, and picking me up. I wrapped my legs around him, cause I was _that_ happy, I didn't even care. "You're fucking in!" Puck repeated.

"I know!" He spun me around, and I loosened my grip around his legs. He got the signal, and put me down. "I can't believe it!" I exclaimed while running my hands through my hair, and leaving them there.

"I can." Sam beamed, coming up behind puck, giving me the biggest hug. "I told you they would like you! I'm so proud of you! You were so good!"

I started to feel a little bit emotional and shocked at the same time. There was so much adrenaline going through me I felt my whole body shaking. "I can't believe I'm actually in." I felt my eyes begin to burn so I pressed my face into Sam's shoulder. He tightened his arms around me. Second later I felt Puck hug me from behind, so now I had them both hugging me. This is exactly what I needed, my two best friends being here for me.

"You're in Santana." Puck breathed out. I closed my eyes and bawled. All the hard work, all the sacrifice's I made to make this happen, was worth hearing the comments from the judges.

"Miss. Lopez?

The sound of my last name for some reason made my heart skip a beat. As if that person would come up to me to tell me that this was all a mistake and none of this really happend. Slowly I turned around. "Yeah?" I asked whipping away the tears that slipped out.

"Can we get your thoughts on how your feeling right now, for the show?" One of the camera men asked.

Sam nudged you, and I breathed out a laugh. "Yes, of course." I turned to Sam and Puck, "Do I have any smudged mascara?" I asked, whipping under your eyes.

Sam licked his thumb and swiped it in the corner of my right eye. "There." He assured with a giggle.

"That was super gross." I grinned, and he laughed in return. I turned to the camera man who was ready to interview me. All of a sudden I became nervous. Wow, okay, I'm going to get interviewed, is this going to happen all the time? What should I say? This is so crazy. I bowed my head, and shook it in disbelieve. This is really happening. When I gazed back up I had the biggest smile on my face. I can do this. "Okay." I nodded

The camera man positioned the camera on his shoulder and pressed a button at the top of it. "Okay, how are you feeling about getting 4 yes's from the judges?"

Before I was about to answer the question, my attention was stolen by a girl walking up the stairs to the stage. I could still hear all the noises the crowd was making out in the arena. It gave me butterflies, I was nervous for her. I wondered if she felt the way I felt when I was in that same position not too long ago.

I brought my attention back to the camera man.

I let out a big breath followed by a shocked laugh. "Honestly? It's amazing. I can't believe it. That was so cool, so cool. I didn't expect them to like me that much. It's just, wow." I didn't know what to say. This is all just so crazy for me. I'm in fucking X Factor. I'm In. My eyes began to burn again, and I felt them began to water. "It just felt incredible."

"What do you have to say to all the other contestants that got a yes for Boot Camp?"

I grinned, "You all best bring it."

I heard the music from the arena stop, which means the girl finished. That was fast.

"Who's your support team?" The camera man began again.

I looked back at Sam and Puck and smiled at their obviousness at wanting to be in the camera shot. I tuned back to the camera man and pointed with my thumb behind me. "I have my best friends with me, I couldn't ask for a better support team." I finished with a smile.

The camera man pressed a button on the camera and brought it down to his side. "Thank you Miss. Lopez that's all we need." He nodded. "By the way, you were really good. I think I'm already a fan." He smiled, and walked away.

I have a fan? The comment brought a huge smile on my face. My gaze followed the camera man till my eyes landed on the same girl coming down from the stairs in tears. It seemed like she was in a hurry and didn't want to talk to anybody. I'm guessing those are not happy tears. I all of a sudden wanted to know what Brittany S. Pierce told her. Not sure why her, and not any of the other judges, but I really, really wanted to know. She rushed passed me, followed by an older man and woman, who I'm guessing are her parents.

"Damn, poor girl." Puck remarked. "She was so hot, and actually such a nice girl."

I turned to him confused. "How would you know?"

"Uhh, hello, Puckasaurus talked to her." Puck emphasized, by pointing to himself.

I scoffed, "So while I was getting the biggest news of my life, you were hitting on some girl?"

"I was trying to get into her head. You know? So you wouldn't have to have another competitor. Look whatever I did it for you, okay? For all you know the Puckasaurus was probably on her mind during her audition, that she forgot her lines and ran out crying hysterically." Puck exaggerated.

I didn't believe a thing he said. I chuckled, "Stop calling yourself The Puckasaurus, it's weird." I informed.

Puck just waved me off. Just when I was about to make fun of him, I heard _the_ most amazing sound I have ever heard. I froze, then turned to see where it was coming from. Brittany S. Pierce was walking down a hall way coming towards us. She was laughing at something, I'm assuming, Simon Cowell said. I guess that crying girl was the last contestant for the day.

"Damn, look at those fucking legs." Puck leered.

I couldn't speak. Seeing her coming towards me, took my breath away. "She's beautiful."

"Dude imagine you all fucking hook up. I'll hate you for the rest of my life, but in a way, love you more." Puck confessed.

"Hi." Brittany stopped in front of me. Is she talking to me? I checked with the corner of my eyes if anyone else was behind me, but found only Sam and Puck.

"Hi." I breathed out, smiling.

Brittany smiled, "Just wanted to tell you again that you're incredible Santana. I really hope I get to have you on my team."

I was so amazed she still remembered my name, even though we just met like 15 minutes ago, that's not the point. The point is that she remembers. Honestly I can't believe she's actually even talking to me right now, especially giving me compliments. "Wow, honestly that coming from you means a lot to me. Not to be weird or anything, but I'm kinda a big fan." I confessed, feeling my face get hot.

"Awe, well thank you very much. Coming from you it means a lot." She mimicked, winking.

I laughed, "Oh okay so now you're gonna make fun of me?" I teased.

She giggled. "Of course not." She protested, lifting her right hand to her chest, pretending to feel hurt.

I couldn't stop myself from just staring at her. Having her here in front of me was so different than watching her on TV, or judging me in that arena. I'm actually being able to see who Brittany Pierce actually is.

"Okay good, cause I'll go all Lima Heights on your ass." I grinned at her confusion. She looked so cute.

"You're going to go all what on my ass?" She asked, raising her eye brows in amusement.

I laughed, widening my eyes and shaking my head, "You don't want to know."

She smiled, "Sounds interesting."

"Miss. Pierce your driver is here." Some guy with a headset on his head, informed her.

Brittany turned to him, and nodded. "Okay thank you, Jack." She then turned back to me. "Well it's time for me to head out, but I'll see you at Boot Camp Miss. Lopez. You better impress me even more." She demanded, with a sly smile.

"I will." I said with all the confidence that I had in me. She smiled, and for a minute It seemed like she was gonna say something else but instead turned around, and walked behind the guy named Jack.

"Uhm, do we suddenly not exist?" I saw Sam wave to me from the corner of my eye.

I turned to them with a nervous look on my face. "Guys, I have to make sure I kill it at Book Camp."


	2. Chapter 2

Going back to Lima for a week, felt different in a way. I felt better than I've ever felt in my life. It's as if I had a purpose now. As if my life suddenly meant something so much more. Once Puck, Sam and I got home, we were visited by so many random people. It was hilarious. I swear people I haven't talked to since the begging of high school were suddenly acting like they were my best friends. Uh, yeah okay, get out of my face. I hate people like that. My only true friends are Puck and Sam. They're the ones who've been here for me since the beginning. They don't put up with any of my bull shit, and in a way they actually make me a better, decent person.

After kicking every person that annoyed the hell out of me out of our apartment, it got me thinking of the people who I actually did want to see barging through the door congratulating me.

My family.

I came out my senior year of high school. I'm not ashamed, and I'm sure as hell not scared of what people say behind my back anymore. When I came out to my parents, they were 'so disappointed, and quite frankly disgusted with me'. I was so hurt. My family was the most important thing in my life. I was so close to them, and to hear my brother say he 'disowned me as his sister' was the hardest thing I've ever had to hear. My brother was my best friend; actually my whole family was like a best friend to me. We are, or should I say, we _were_ very close. My parents are very traditional Hispanics, so when something doesn't go their way, they get all crazy.

Puck and Sam were there for me when all this went down. We got an apartment together, and here we are now. They're actually the ones who encouraged me to try out for The X Factor, and I love them so much for it. I still can't believe I got 4 yes's and I'm going to boot camp in a week. A fucking week! It just feels unreal, and every time I think about it, my stomach turns into knots. Thinking of what Brittany Pierce said, about having to impress her more, got me so nervous. I could do it though, I know I can. I just need to practice, and pick a killer song.

"Okay so, now all of a sudden Lima has all the number one fans of X Factor or what?" Puck scoffed with a sneer, sitting down on the couch.

"Seriously man. I'm loving it though." Sam shrugged. "I got Sugar Motta's number." He winked then smiled with that huge mouth of his.

"No way!? I got that hot cheerio's number, the one with the short blonde hair who I really don't remember the name of right now." Puck stated in deep thought. "You know who I'm talking about?" He asked Sam, while I was looking through some songs in my playlists.

"Yes! I don't know her name though, but she's super-hot." Sam stated.

"Yup, she wanted the Puckasaurus here." Puck breathed out, acting conceded. "I mean even though these girls are _pretty_ much using us cause, you know we're famous and all now thanks to our beautiful and wonderful Santana, but that's what we're gonna do to them too right?" Puck winked cockily, and leaned into Sam to do their lame handshake.

"Hell yeah." Sam agreed.

"Okay nuh-uh, seriously, you dicks need to stop." I interjected lifting up my hand to stop them. "Don't talk about girls like that around me."

"Oh come on Santana. You should be used to our talks by now. Come on over and join your brothers." Puck waved me over to the seat next to him on the couch.

"Guys, I really need to pick a song for boot camp. I can't be playing your little games right now." I stated.

"Alright, alright. But you know what?" Sam asked as I turned to him. "Miss. Brittany Pierce was sure digging you, if you know what I mean." He smirked.

Okay, good I'm not the only one who thought that. But that's so wrong. I won't go along with it.

"Uh, no Trouty, I don't." I said annoyed.

"Uh-huh, yup." Puck interjected nodding his head. "Sam and I saw her through the TV they had us watching you in while you auditioned. She was eye fucking the shit out of you Lopez. I didn't know she was a lesbian." Puck glanced between Sam and I, as to see if we knew.

"I don't think she is." I commented, hoping it was true, because first of all, I don't want to be reading too much into things the next time we're able to talk. Second, I don't want to do something stupid and get disqualified from the show.

"Google!" Sam chipped in pulling out his phone. I went brought my attention back to my song selections, pretending I didn't really care. Which in reality I kind of did, but come on, we have to be realistic here. Brittany Pierce will never be into me. It's just too weird to think about, I mean she's like an A list celebrity. I would always watch her on the show Glee every Thursday night. And now Puck and Sam think she _wants_ some of this? That's crazy.

"Okay let's see here." Sam said looking closely at his phone. Puck got up and squatted down next to Sam's seat to get a view of his phone as well. I couldn't stop from rolling my eyes at how dumb they looked right now. How can they think Brittany Pierce is a lesbian? Didn't she have a boyfriend? Like a baseball player or something?

"Okay so she _had_ a boyfriend. Some baseball player, but it says here they broke up 2 months ago." Sam read.

"Then she has to be bi. I know these things. I have really good gaydar." Puck confessed nodding his head. Again I rolled my eyes at him.

"Puck she's not bi. Get over it." I said annoyingly.

"It doesn't say anything about her being bi. The only relationship it says she's been with is with that baseball player, no girls." Sam said, while scrolling down looking for more information.

"Well then you're turning her. Dude look, I know what I'm telling you, sh-"

"-Puck stop trying to put things in my head! It's never gonna happen. I need to be focusing on winning this thing, or at least be able to surviving boot camp." I interjected frustrated. "Gosh, I'm so stressed out already with not having a song picked out yet, and now you're putting this "hunch" with Brittany in my head? It's crazy! And I'm done talking about it." I got up, grabbed my things and walked to my room.

Once I settled down in my bed, I felt a tang of guilt hit me. I shouldn't have lashed out on Puck, but gosh he can be so annoying sometimes. Pucks my best friend though, he was just pointing out something he thinks he saw.

I pictured myself on that stage again, hearing the crowd going crazy. It was the best day of my life. All the comments from the judges started re-playing in my head. Especially Brittany Pierce's.

I heard a soft knock on my door, which put a smile on my face cause I know it's gonna be Puck with his sad little pout.

"Come in."

The door opened and in came Puck, with of course, that stupid sad face I knew he would put on for me.

"You're an idiot." I said laughing. Puck relaxed his face muscles to normal and smiled sitting down next to me.

"I'm sorry." He breathed out, putting his head down. "I just- I want you to be happy Santana." He confessed looking up to me.

We locked eyes and it felt like he was staring straight into my soul. It was weird. "Puck, I am happy." My left hand went to grab _his_ right hand and was soon joined by my other hand. "I love you so much for always being there for me. Having you and Sam next to me through all this, is all I need to be happy." I ended with a smile.

Puck smiled and leaned in to give me a kiss on my cheek. "I'll always be here for you, no matter what. And you're gonna win this thing Santana. I know it, and all those random people who came today know it too. That's why they wanted pictures with you and all that shit, cause you're gonna be a Motha. Fucking. Star." He ended while bobbing my nose. I scrunched it up and smiled at him.

"Hey Santana, I think I found a song that will be awesome for you." Sam showed up at my door still looking at his phone. "Have you heard that new Bruno Mars song?" He asked, glancing up at me.

Hmm, a new Bruno Mars song? I spaced out in thought trying to figure out which song he was talking about, but none came to mind, so I shook my head.

"The one that goes 'Cause you make me feel like, I've been locked out of heaven?'" He sang quickly, eyeing me questionably.

"Hey watch out killer, maybe you should have tried out for X Factor too." Puck teased.

"Shut up." Sam waved him of and sat next to me on the opposite side of Puck, showing me his phone. "It's a really good song, and I think with your raspy, sexy voice, you'll kill it." He pressed play on the video and I'm not gonna lie, I really liked it.

When the video finished I had already planed all the ways I could make the song my own style. "I like it." I said happily to Sam.

"Yeah, and maybe when you sing it, you can be doing his little dance moves. You know? Make it sexy for Miss. Brittany Pi-"

"Don't start again." I warned still smiling excitedly. "I'm so excited! I need to start practicing." I squealed getting up and getting my computer. "Puck you think you can mix up the song a little bit, so I can make it my own style?" I asked sitting back down, opening my laptop.

"Yeah of course, how would you want it or what?" He asked, grabbing the laptop from me.

"Maybe like a piano version, or an acoustic version of it, so they can hear my vocals more? Wouldn't that be good?" I asked.

Sam and Puck both nodded. "Yeah I think that will sound fucking awesome. You're so gonna kill it." Sam ended enthusiastically.

I smiled at him and squealed clapping my hands together.

"Alright, well I'll get started on it my little princess. In the meantime, go on and do something with your life." Puck shushed me away with his hands.

"What? No. I want to stay here." I laughed. "What do expect me to do?"

"I don't know" Puck shrugged. "Why don't you go shopping for outfits to wear at boot camp?"

"That's true." I nodded. "I should do that. Trouty, wanna come with me?" I asked turning to him putting a pout on.

"Yeah, sure." Sam said, getting up. "I need to shop too. I need to impress the ladies back in LA." He busts out a beat, and starts dancing like his old stripper days.

"Oh, my god." I get up; walking passed him out the door, while he's still doing his stupid stomach roll, which always makes me laugh, "Let's go Trouty, oh and we have to take your truck, since I have no gas do to our little road trip." I said patting his chest.

"Alrighty Princess. Puck, bro don't cry when we leave, alright?" He joked pointing at Puck. "We'll be back in no time."

Puck made a crying face, nodding his head. "Okay."

"You, guys are so weird." I laughed. "Puck, make my song fucking awesome please." I begged.

"Duhh."

…

Shopping in the Lima mall has always been my stress reliever. It just calms me down. The noises, the smells, the annoying people asking to try out their new merchandise. It reminds me of a time of when everything was simpler. A time when my mom would join me, and help me pick out an outfit for school. It reminds me of home.

"You bought a lot of cool clothes. Is it stating to hit you more yet?" Sam asked nudging my shoulder.

Buying these clothes _did _make me realize that this is it. Whatever clothes I buy I'll be wearing it in front of _the_ judges. I'll be making an impression on them. I'll be showing off my style to the world, well whoever watches the show, and it has to be perfect.

"It's starting to hit me really bad." I confessed, shaking my head.

"I can't wait to see you up on that boot camp stage. Wait. Will we even be able to see you?" Sam asked a little scared of the answer.

"I think so; I remember seeing one of the contestant's parents watching him from the stands when I watched the show." I reassured.

"Google!" Sam chimed in.

I laughed, "Google is like your best friend."

"Yup." Sam confirmed while typing something out on his phone. "It's Google, then you, and then Puck." He said smiling.

"OH, so I'm second?" I teased, holding my hand to my heart.

"Yes." He giggled. "But don't tell puck though!" He warned pointing at me.

"Of course I'm going to tell him. Who do you think I am?" I said laughing.

Sam grabbed me, tickling me. "Santana, no!" He giggled. "He's gonna be devastated."

I was trying to get away from his tickling hands, but he was everywhere! I hate being tickled! I feel like I don't have any control of my actions when someone tickles me, especially when someone tickles my armpits. Honestly, my worst fear _isn't_ being eaten by a shark, or attacked by a snake. It's being tied up to a bed, hands over my head, having my armpits out and free, and someone going to tickle them. I'll die! Like literally die.

"SAM STOP!" I said giggling.

"Santana?"

Sam's hands stop tickling me and we both turned to the sound of my name.

"Michael?" I breathed out.

Standing in front of me, was none other than my older brother. I felt like crying. I haven't seen him in almost a year. We just stood there staring at each other, discovering all the differences we've missed in each other lives. Like how fitter he looked, and how I've never seen that hair cut style on him, or how his eyes looked different in some weird way. He looked really good, his face expression though displayed somewhat of hurt. I could tell that he didn't know what to say, and it ache me. So I made it real easy for both of us.

I smiled, grabbing Sam's arm, while still keeping eye contact with my brother. I saw his eyes land on my hand on Sam, so I quickly let go. "Let's go Sam." I smiled one last time and turned back around to the direction we were heading before. I felt his eyes on me and it was the worst feeling ever. I just wanted him to call my name out, with his arms wide open for me to run into, and for him to tell me he's sorry, and that's all! I'll forgive him! I swear I'll forgive him. Having my brother back in my life would be amazing, but it seems like that's not happening anytime soon.

My eyes were getting blurry with tears threatening to come out. "Sam, look back and check if he's still standing there." I asked with my voice shaky.

I felt Sam turn, "No, he's not there anymore." He answered in a soft voice. He turned back to me, and put his arm around me, while we continued walking. Tears were coming out of my eyes like a fucking water fall. This is the last thing I need right now. "Do you want to stop and sit down?" Sam whispered in my ear.

I shook my head "Just take me home please." He tightened his arm around me and continued walking.

The ride back home was quiet. The ache in my chest wouldn't go away. It's crazy how seeing someone can just mess you up. I was so happy earlier, and now my night is ruined. I wonder if my family knows if I made it boot camp. I hope they do. I want to prove to them that no matter what they've put me through, I'm still standing strong, and I'm gonna make my dreams come true without them.

"Just a couple of more days" I whispered to myself.

…

Boot Camp was completely different than what I expected it would be. I was so naïve in thinking I can just show up, sing my badass song, and move to the next round. I didn't even come to _think _about all the other fucking contestants, who I'm not going to lie, are scaring the shit out of me right now. This is crazy! There's like a fucking fourteen year old girl on my left singing like she's Mariah Carey or something. Then to my right there's a guy practicing in a corner, and from what I'm hearing, I'd fucking just hand him a damn contract already. I'm so screwed.

"This place is mad packed!" Puck observed.

I glanced around some more at all the incredible, talented people walking around getting comfortable with the little space they have in their area. All the contestants that got at least 3 or more yes's, are all here in this very room, so I'm literally surrounded by all my competition. Shit just got serious. I need to snap the fuck out of it. I can do this!

"Guy's I can't do this." I shook my head, standing up and gathering my things.

"Santana, stop," Sam grabbed my hand, which made me stop what I was doing. "You know I've always been honest with you, right?" I rolled my eyes and nodded. "Okay then believe me when I say that you _can_ do this. Yes, everyone here is fucking talented to the max, but so are you. All you have to do is be confident, believe in yourself, and _that's_ what's going to get you in." Sam ranted. "Okay? So stop being a little girl, and get to practicing so everyone here can be scared of you." He joked, patting me in the shoulder.

I smiled and nodded.

Okay, Santana you can do this. Fuck all these people around you. You need this. You want this. You have to win.

I shook my head, and put my headphones on, listening to the track Puck worked so hard on. It came out just like I wanted it. He made an acoustic track, that lets my voice stand out, which is exactly what I wanted. I was singing the song softly, bobbing my head with the rhythm. I kept re-playing and re-playing it until I saw a man with a head set in his head, and a clipboard in his hand, get up on a table to shout something out. I quickly took of my headphones and listened to everyone around me quiet down. I suddenly got nervous. My stomach was doing crazy twists and turns, which was making me want to throw up.

He raised both hands, including the clipboard to his mouth, "Okay everyone listen up. We're gonna move all of the contestants to the stage in the arena. In there, you will audition for the 4 judges again, in _front_ of each other. So in about five minutes, go on and enter through these double doors on my left. Parents, family, friends, supporters, whoever is here with you, come in through this door behind me. You _will_ be able to sit on the stands and watch the auditions go on. Good luck to all of you." He shouted, getting off the table.

I turned around to Puck and Sam. "Holy shit, this is it." I breathed out. I felt my whole body shaking with nerves, and excitement. I started gathering my things so I can leave already.

Puck took a deep breath, and then let it out, "Okay, go kick some ass princess." He winked.

I shook my hands to get rid of the nerves, and smiled. "I will."

"That's what I like to hear." Sam chimed in. "We'll be up in the stands cheering your name." He promised, pulling me in for a hug, and a kiss on the cheek, as did Puck.

I made my way to the double doors as was everyone else. I saw that, Mariah Carey sing a like, walking a couple of people in front of me. She looked scared, and nervous, which in a sick way made me happy. I shook my head at my thoughts, glancing up I saw the lights to the stage ahead. As I was getting closer to it, I got flashbacks to a week ago when I auditioned in this very stage in front of the judges and the audience. It got me thinking. If they loved me _then, _they'll love me now, right?

As I was now on the stage, I glanced at the empty judges table. I'm going to get to see _her_ again. I have to do the song just how I practice it. I have to get into it, and do my little dance moves, and everything will be okay.

I sat down to the right of the stage, next to some blonde girl to my left and a guy with, what it seemed like blush on his cheeks?, on my left. The last of the people were finishing sitting down. The whole stage was almost covered by all of us. The only spot that was uncovered was the top middle of the stage, the spot right in front of the judges.

"Are you nervous?" A sudden soft voice came out of the blonde girl next to me.

As I turned to her and was met by those hazel eyes, I realized how beautiful she was. "Uhm, no not really." I lied. I was fucking terrified.

"Wow, really? I'm so nervous." The hazel eyed girl confessed, with a shake of her head and a smile.

I smiled too, "Yeah, well I lied, I am nervous." I confessed with a laugh.

The blonde laughed too. "Okay good, cause I don't want to be the only one not nervous around here." She admitted.

"I'm sure _we're_ not." I reassured glancing around the stage.

The man with the headset, from before, came back. "Okay guys, are the camera's ready?" He shouted to a camera man, which gave him a thumps up. "Okay good, everything's in check. Cue the Judges." He talked to his headset.

Right on mark, the judges came out one by one. First it was L.A. Reid, then Britney Spears, Simon Cowell came behind her, and Brittany Pierce came out last. Everyone around me started cheering, and clapping.

My eyes were glued to Brittany Pierce; she put a smile to my face, seeing her got me excited about this whole experience.

The judges all sat down in their chairs, and started waving at us. "Well hello, hello!" L.A. shouted excitedly. "Welcome to boot camp!" There was another loud cheer.

"I hope you guys are ready to bring it!" Brittany Pierce hollered, giggling at her response of cheers.

"I hope you had a good break, and I hope you practiced, cause this is it. Either you do great today, or you don't. You go home, or you stay." Noted Simon.

As I looked around at other people I saw that everyone's face expression was different. Some looked like they were gonna pass out, some looked confident and giddy, other's I just couldn't read. In a way I feel confident. My song choice is a top 40 song right now, its fun, it's sexy, and I'm just going to have fun with it.

"Okay so now that Simon has clearly ruined this moment-"Brittany Pierce joked, laughing at Simon's 'What?' expression, "-let's get started."

"Yes! Come on! Entertain me!" L.A. Reid shouted.

"First up is…"


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry i know it's been forever!:/**

"First up is…"

Holy Shit this is it.

Please don't say my name first, please.

But it's a good thing if you go first. You'll get it over with.

No I can't go first, I can't, I can't, I can't. No, no, no. And- OH great, now I'm panicking. What the hell is wrong with me! What happened? I was so ready, and I felt so confident about all this, and now I'm panicking. I'm Santana Lopez and I'm fucking panicking. What the fuck is going on here?

"Diamond White." Simon announced.

Oh thank God. Oh Lord Jesus thank you.

I felt my heart rate go down a slight bit. I glanced across the stage from me and saw a skinny, young, black girl getting up. She looked a little nervous but had a huge smile on her face. She was getting pats on her back from the people around her, which I'm sure, made her a little more confident.

Okay, Santana don't worry about this youngster.

She walked to the middle of the stage and a staff member met her there to hand her a microphone.

"Hey guys what's up?" The young Aretha greeted to the judges.

Is this girl for real? I couldn't help but laugh in the inside. She's _no_ competition.

"How are you sweetheart?" Simon chimed in, his accent sounding more foreign than ever.

"Good how are you?"

"Well you had a good first audition didn't you?" Simon recalled, ignoring her question.

"Yes." She nodded, so sure of herself.

Well look at Miss Thang over here having all the confidence in the world. I glanced at the judges table and saw them all smiling at her. Are you kidding me? Is she really gonna get all the sympathetic votes _just_ _cause_ she's all small and shit. Nuh-uh no way. This shit better not be rigged.

"Yeah. Okay. Good luck." Simon nodded his head so she can get along with the audition.

For a moment it was silent. I was staring at the young girl and for a second I kind of got jealous of how well together she seemed to have it. Suddenly a tune started playing. It was soft at first and then began getting louder.

NO WAY.

My mouth dropped. Is she seriously doing Whitney Houston?!

"_Share my life; take me for what I am_…" She began singing.

I dropped my head in shame. That girl has a _fucking_ voice. Damn and she's only like what, thirteen? Oh fuck. I can only imagine all the other people around me. I turned to the short, blonde haired girl next to me, and saw her swaying to the music, smiling at the girl singing. Is she gonna be this amazing as well? I mean I'm pretty sure, why else would she be here.

"She's so good." A small voice praised.

I kept my stare on the blonde as she turned to stare at me, still wearing that smile on her face. I nodded, and turned my attention back to the little girl. "Yeah." I breathed out.

"You'll do great." She whispered, touching my shoulder.

The blonde girl turned her attention back to the new Whitney, and I couldn't help myself but stare at her for a few second longer. She's like _way_ pretty. My attention was ripped away when the little girl hit the high note in the song. I saw all the people around me suddenly second guess themselves about this whole thing. I could see it in their eyes.

"_I have nothing, nothing, nothing! If I don't have you." _Diamond White sang the last line with so much passion, that even I wanted to go up to her and shake her hand, or something.

Everyone started clapping and I saw Simon give her a thumps up. "Thank you." Simon announced.

"Man she's awesome fool." I heard some guy say behind me say to one of his group member. "It's just a lil competition, just a lil."

A _little_ competition? _Damn_ I could only imagine how good _they're_ going to be.

I heard Simon clear his trough. Fuck. Someone's up next. I wouldn't want to be the one to go after her. Shit, shit, shit.

"Okay next up is…"

…

"Santana?" I turned at the sudden call of my name. It was Sam and Puck walking towards me.

"Hey." I nodded, solemnly.

Once they got close enough, I saw Puck carrying a nervous face expression. "There's some crazy ass talent up there." Puck clarified. "Did you hear that guy with all those tattoos on his head? His voice was so badass." Puck praised.

I just stared at him with a scold on my face. That is _not_ something I need to hear right now, especially since I thought the same damn thing. "Yeah Puck I was there." I scolded. "I just- Ugh! I can't take this anymore! Why haven't they called me? They've practically called everyone except me! We've taken two brakes already. Two!" I motioned two fingers in both their faces. "And nothing. I've had to sit in there and watch all these amazing people sing their ass off; while I just panicked every single time they were actually good. Which _was_ every fucking time."

"Look, I think it's better if you're one of the last people to audition. It gives you an upper hand, an advantage of being on their minds when it's time for them to vote." Sam stated.

"Yeah Sam, but- what if they don't like me? What if I have to go back home? How embarrassing would that be?" I stressed running my hands through my hair.

"You know Santana; I'm not even worried about you stressing like this right now. You _always_ seem to go crazy before every performance you've ever done. Ever since glee." He laughed and bumped my shoulder. "And they you go on and you kick some ass. Like always. You just worry too much babe. I know for a fact that you're better than half of those people, and they're probably saving you for last cause they know you're the best." He shrugged. "It makes good TV."

"Excuse me? Only _half_ of those people?" I asked with a small smirk on my face.

"There you go. Get your bitchiness out. You need that attitude of yours in order to win this thing. By the way, I'm in love."

"Oh my God with who now, Puck?"

"Carly."

"Ugh she's like 12 years old. Perv."

"I can deal with that. She certainly didn't sound like a 12 year old. Her performance was crazy."

I saw a camera man was recording us from a far. They had told me they would do that, and when it did happen, just to ignore them. They needed to catch some private footage for the show.

"Yeah she was insane." I bit my lip nervously. I felt my stomach start to hurt a little, and it's probably because I haven't eaten anything since I got here. I've been such a nervous wreck; I wasn't sure what would happen if I would consume something. "Guys, I think I'm going to go to the cafeteria to get a snack, I'm pretty hungry. "I murmured. "I'm gonna need to be back in there in a couple of minutes, and for sure, this time, I'll be going up. This is the last brake so. This is it." I said slowly.

They both smiled at me, and gave me a firm hug not saying anything.

"I can't wait to see everyone fall in love with that voice of yours." Sam spoke taking a step away from me. "And for like the hundredth time, you're going to do great." He giggled.

"Yeah, you're a lot better than you give yourself credit for Santana." Puck stated seriously. "You'll see." He added, smiling.

"Thanks guys."

"Now go eat, go sing your little attitude heart out, and make those judges fall in love with you… again." Puck instructed. They gave me one last big hug and walked back to the auditorium.

I walked to the cafeteria and noticed most of the competitors were in there. Some were talking amongst themselves and others were just eating there snack alone in a table. I walked to the counter they had full of snacks and got some crackers. I felt someone slide in next to me, and when I glanced up I saw it was the pretty blonde. Her voice is actually really beautiful. It has something in it that just draws you to it and you don't want to stop listening. She sang the song _Love Song, _and it went perfect with her voice. I could tell the judges really liked it. Except for some reason, I saw Brittany Pierce look a little annoyed. She's probably tired of all this already, which sucks for me cause I'm going up next.

"What's your name?"

I turned, and saw the blonde was waiting for me to answer her.

"Santana."

"Hi. I'm Quinn,"

"HI." For a moment neither of us said anything, we just smiled. "You were really good out there. I'm sure you'll be through to the next round."

"I'm kind of excited to hear you sing actually. A lot of people are talking about you."

"Me? What the hell about?"

Quinn laughed, "They're saying you're the one to look out for. But. I'll be the judge of that." She said with an eyebrow raised, then walked away.

I stood there stunned.

I'm the one to look out for? Really?

Walking back to the auditorium I felt twice as stressed as I was before. Ugh! Why did that beautiful girl have to tell me that? She's trying to get inside my head, that's what it is.

I was one of the last people to enter, and my stomach was going crazy. I felt weak. I felt shaky. I felt my heart racing a hundred miles an hour. In just a few seconds my life could change forever. In just a few seconds _I'm_ going to be singing in front of A list celebrities.

"Is everything ready?" The same man from last time talked to his ear piece. "Okay then bring out the judges."

Not even a minute later and all the judges came out at the same time. I saw Britney Spears and Brittany Pierce talking to each other once they sat down. It looks like Brittany Pierce isn't looking all that annoyed anymore. She's looking pretty excited now, which is making my stomach do crazy flips.

"Okay everyone. We've been here for about two and a half hours. We only need two more performances and then we'll make our decision of who gets to go to the next round. I just want to address that you've all been great, and for those of you who don't make it tonight, don't quit." L.A. preached.

They paused for a moment getting everything in their table organized. I saw Simon scan through the list of all the names.

This is it. I'm next.

"Okay. Arin Ray. You're up next."

What. The. Actual. Fuck? I'm going to be the last one! How crazy is that? My last name starts with an L! They're going in alphabetical order, which means I should have gone a long ass time ago. Is there something wrong? Am I not on the list? Am I even supposed to be here?

"How crazy is it that you're going to be last?" I heard Quinn whisper excitedly.

"It's pretty crazy."

I saw a guy walk up the center of the stage and introduce himself. To be honest I couldn't even make out what he was saying. It felt like my heart was banging in my ears. What song am I singing again? Oh, yeah. Okay. Yeah it's a good song. I like it. They'll like it. I'll make it to the next round. I'll make it.

It seemed like I had missed the beginning of the song the guy was singing. He didn't look that old, maybe like 16.I glanced at the judges table and they were all pretty intrigued by him. Except Brittany Pierce. Instead of staring at him, she was staring at me. We kept eye contact for what felt like forever, until she turned away.

"Thank you Arin."

They boy handed back the microphone and walked back to his seat, receiving praises from the people around him.

Was he good?

"Santana Lopez."

As I heard my name, I felt all the air inside of me escape. I got up with shaky legs.

"Kill it." Quinn whispered to me before I walked to the center.

"Let's go Santana!"

I glanced up and saw Puck and Sam being quieted down by the security guards.

They handed me the microphone and I glanced to the judges table.

I did my signature hair flip, "Hi." I said with a wave and a smile. I glanced at Brittany Pierce as she was saying something to Britney Spears. And for some reason, all my stress went away. I wasn't all that nervous anymore. I know I can do this.

"So you did really good in your first audition. You got four yes's."

"I did. I'm not going to lie, I honestly don't even remember my first audition, it was like a crazy dream."

I heard Brittany Pierce giggle.

"I remember really well," Chimed in Simon.

"It was incredible." Brittany Pierce added.

I laughed in amazement, "Thank you."

"Okay go for it."

Awh Shit.

"Okay."

I closed my eyes and let the adrenaline take over. I heard the track Puck and I worked on begin, and after that, my body was on its own. I wasn't controlling it anymore. It was controlling itself. But it was working cause I heard some whistling coming from the back. As my queue came on, I stared singing. I glanced at the judges table and saw them bobbing their heads to the music. Brittany Pierce had her eyes on me the whole time. And for some reason I couldn't take my eyes off her. I didn't seem wrong. She liked it.

I tried to move around the stage frequently and kept messing with my hair. I shook my hips, and as I saw it on every one of the contestants faces, I looked sexy.

"Oh, yeah yeah yeah yeah. Ugh!" I sang, belting it out as raspy as I could.

I stood there out of breath, waiting for them to say something, but as they did with everyone else, they just assured me to sit down. I was confused. I did a hell of a job. I _know_ I did a hell of a job.

I made my way back to my seat, and that's when all the praising began.

See? They loved me, why couldn't the judges just tell me something comforting?

"You were amazing! I knew you were going to be good, I knew it!" Quinn exclaimed.

I laughed, still a little confused about what happened. I was sure they were going to at least say 'good job, Santana' but nope, nothing. "Thanks." I mumbled to Quinn.

There was a lot of chattering from everyone around me. Nerves were kicking in again. Did I not do my performance right? Shit. What if I'm not what they're looking for?

I'm feeling excited and nervous like all at the same time. You never know what they're looking for; I mean it's all in their hands. Everything is in their hands.

"Okay everyone. We're going to split you up into 3 groups. Here goes the first group. When I call your name stand by the far right side."

Simon started calling a bunch of names, but mine didn't come out. Okay so one of the groups has to be the one with all the winners. I _have_ to be in that one. Suddenly I heard Simon call out the name, Carly Rose Sonenclar, the little girl that was amazing. I know for sure she has to be going through the next round, so I _have_ to be in that group! He kept on calling out name after name, and then suddenly stopped.

"Okay now for group 2. When I call your name stand in the center."

My heart dropped. I'm not in the winner group. They're sending me home. This was all for nothing. There goes my only chance of proving something to people back home. There goes my only chance at getting my family back.

"Okay group 3 to the left."

Just send me fucking home already douche bag.

"Santana Lopez."

There you go. Humiliate me in front of the whole world. I walked to the left side with my arms crossed. I'm so pissed right now. I glanced up at the stands and saw Puck and Sam staring at me. They didn't look nervous at all. They were actually giving me thumps up and smiling like idiots. Can they not see I'm _not_ in the winners group? Do they really have to make me feel bad right now?

"Alright, now that we've got that settled," L.A. spoke. I realized that they all seemed really bummed. Like they didn't want to do this. They didn't want to see people go home.

"Hey. Santana." I heard a soft voice call me. When I turned I saw Quinn was in the same group as me and she was trying to squeeze her way up to me.

"We're in the same group?"

"Yes! Which means we're in!"

"Why would you say that?"

"Cause you're in this group."

"Don't say that."

"Why not? It's true!"

"Yeah well. One minute I feel confident, one minute I don't feel confident. It's like a roller coaster ride."

Quinn was about to say something when Brittany Pierce cut her off.

"Okay! You all were wonderful. I enjoyed each and every one of your performance, and if it was up to me? I would put all of you all into the next round, but unfortunately we can't," she paused. "Ohhph I just got really nervous." She giggled.

Simon joined in on the giggled, then put his attention back to us. "This is a really good experience, right?" I turned and saw people nodding next to me. My hands were shaking, and my eyes were getting watery. This _is_ such a great experience, and now I'm going to go home. "Yeah? Good. You enjoyed it?" Again people stared nodding. I just stood there with my eyes on the ground. With the way the judges faces contemplated, especially Brittany Pierce, I just couldn't bear to stare. "Good. The good news is that we're not going to delay this any longer. The process we've gone through, we've reviewed every single one of you. Our decision is…" He paused. "Group 1. You're through to the next round."

I glanced up to the group that Carly Rose Sonenclar was in and saw everyone jumping up and down. They were yelling and picking each other up and pretty much going crazy.

"If group one can please step off the auditorium." Simon said smiling.

As group one left the stage, the only ones who were left was my group and group 2.

"Okay now. Only one more group will be going through to the next round." Britney Spears spoke.

I felt a hand tangle their fingers into mine. When I glanced down I saw Quinn's white hand squished in mine.

"Group 2…" He paused, and I glanced up at Simon, biting my lip. "It's bad news," I closed my eyes, letting out a big breath. I felt Quinn's squeeze my hand. "You're going to have to work hard tomorrow. You're through to the next round."

My head shot up. "What!?"

All of a sudden I was being lifted off the ground and a loud thunder of yells began to erupt.

"We're in? Quinn we're in?" I yelled as she was putting me down, and gave each other a huge hug.

"I told you!" she yelled.

Oh my God. Oh my God!

"Santana!" I glanced up and saw Puck and Sam jumping up and down. I couldn't help but laugh.

"I'm in!" I yelled to them.

"Group 1 one we are really sorry, but you're going home."

I'm in bitches!

"Congratulations group 2."

Once group 3 left the stage, one of the men brought back group 1 to celebrate with us. Everyone was so excited, jumping around and going all insane. The judges came up to the auditorium to celebrate with us as well.

"I can't believe we're actually in!" Quinn said holding her head in shock.

"I know! I honestly didn't know what to think anymore! Just one more round, and then it's time for the big leagues."

"Santana?"

I turned and saw Brittany Pierce walk towards us. Again my heart began to race. I had forgotten how beautiful she was up close.

"Oh my God, Brittany Pierce! I'm such a big fan! Thank you so much for passing me to the next round. Thank you so much." Quinn ranted.

I just kept my eyes on Brittany and how annoyed she looked by Quinn. She nodded with a fake smile, "You deserve it sweetie."

"Thank you!" Quinn's attention was stolen when some guy started congratulating her.

Who the hell is that guy?

"You were amazing."

I brought back my attention to Brittany Pierce. "Thank you. I really appreciate it," we stayed quiet, with our smiles. "So," I said narrowing my eyes. "Would you say I passed my test at impressing you like I said I would?"

"Maybe."

"Maybe? No, I think I did."

"Oh really?"

"Yah. I saw your face. You were pretty impressed with my awesome dancing. Just come on, admit it."

She began to laugh. "You're funny. But. We'll just have to wait and see tomorrow."

"Ugh. Don't get me nervous."

"Are you kidding? You have to reason to be nervous," she stepped closer to me and whispered. "To be honest, you're the best one in here. Why do you think we put you last?...Well that was actually because of me."

My eyes went wide. "What? What do you mean?"

"What? I was trying to help you. I really want you to go through."

"Why? I mean not that I don't appreciate it, cause I do, but..." I lost my trail of thought. I stopped myself from saying something that I don't want to say. I don't want this to get weird or anything so I'm just going to leave it at that.

But why does she want me to win?

"I want you to go through because… I want you to be in my group for the live shows. I have a feeling you're going to win this whole thing."

Ohhhh that's why.

"Oh. Ha. Wow, well thanks. I hope I go through as well."

She was about to say something else, but I could see that she was contemplating on it. "Okay. Well. I'll see you tomorrow Santana." And she walked away.

Okay? That was like the strangest thing ever.

"Santana!" I turned and saw Puck and Sam running towards me. "You've made through the first round!" Sam yelled while he picked me up.

"Can you believe it?" I laughed as he put me down.

"Of course we can. We told you all along."

"I know, I know." I said going in for Puck's hug.

"Hey, who's the girl with short blonde hair?" Puck asked.

I let go of Puck and looked him in the eyes. "No."

"Yours?"

I turned to look at Quinn, but then caught Brittany's eyes on me. "I don't know yet." I replied keeping my eyes on deep ocean blues.

* * *

**Please Review! Let me know what you think.**


	4. Chapter 4

"Santana go! It's your turn up!" I heard Puck yell from a couple of feet away from me. "Go. Go!"

It's my turn up where? I glanced around the area I was in. What the hell is he talking about?

"What are you talking about?" I yelled a little louder since Puck seemed to move farther away.

What the hell is he doing?

"Santana you got this. You were born for this." Sam stated as he walked passed me, entering a long hall way. I stared at him in confusion as he kept on walking, without saying another word.

"Sam- what? Where are you going?" I groaned.

"Your voice is amazing. You are, amazing." I heard a soft voice say behind me. As I turned I saw Quinn's figure fixed there, smiling and nodding at me.

"Wow. When did you get here? I didn't even hear you." I said amused. I didn't get a response, she just continued to stare and smile that smile of hers. "Quinn? You okay?" I stepped a little closer to her, and glanced around the area we were in, again. "Where the hell are we? Did by any chance you happen to see where my two friends went? They were just here a minute ago and now… there nowhere to be seen." I breathed out, trying to spot the guys.

"You like me."

I jolted my eyes toward hers, and furrowed my eyebrows in confusion when she didn't seem to be joking. I blinked a couple of times, trying to understand what just left out of her mouth correctly. "Excuse me?"

"You like me, Santana."

"I don't even know you."

"So? You don't know Brittany Pierce, and you like her. Right?"

"What? How do you know I'm a- Why would you say that?" I croaked, folding my arms to my chest.

"Because I know."

"Well. That's a little weird."

"She'll never love you."

I gulped, "I never said I wanted her to love me."

"Everyone can see you want it. It's all over your eyes."

"You're wrong! Everyone is wrong. No one knows me. No one but Puck and Sam." I burst out, glancing around again for my two best friends. This place is weird; I just want to get the hell out of here.

"_I'm_ here for you Santana. No one else. Puck and Sam left you. They told me to tell you, that you shouldn't go through with this. It's a mistake."

I was growing frustrated. I had to move around, I had to get out of here. "Why would they do that to me? How can they leave me?"

"You're not good enough." She shrugged.

My heart sank. I'm not good enough to do this. I knew it; it's just too much pressure. I can just quit. Yeah I can just quit and forget about all of this. I just need to find Puck and Sam first. I began walking away from Quinn and started walking in a different direction, quickly. There's was nothing, and no one in sight. I felt trapped. Everything around me was just bright lights.

I kept on glancing around, my breath starting to hitch up. Am I… am I honestly fucking dead right now?

"You're the best one in this competition, Santana." I turned at the sudden familiar voice on my right side. Brittany Pierce stood there looking like an angel now more than ever, except her eyes seemed different. They looked upset. "I really don't like that girl." She hissed.

"Brittany? You're here too? Have you seen Puck, and Sam? How the hell do we get out of here?"

"Don't worry, I'm here." Brittany relaxed me, moving closer to me. "You have to know, you are the best one here. You can do this."

I felt my eyes start to burn with unwanted tears due to all this frustration. I shrugged, "How do you know that?"

She rested her right hand on my cheek, and I suddenly didn't care where I was anymore. "Because I believe in you Santana. You have to win this. I _need_ you to win this." Suddenly my whole world stopped when she leaned her head slightly down and closed the gap between our lips, softly. Before I knew it she was pulling back but I kept my eyes closed, not wanting it to end. When my fluttering eyes finally opened, they instantly widened at the sight of Simon Cowell now replacing Brittany Pierce.

"Hi." He said smiling, before leaning in again.

"What the fuck? Oh my god!"

My eyes rapidly shot open, and I used both of my hands to help my upper body up. My breathing was short, heavy breaths. Sweat beads ran down my face and my hands. I looked around the room, wide eyed, making sure I was back in the hotel room. I saw Puck and Sam asleep beside me, and I quickly relaxed. I softly groaned and leaned myself back into my pillow.

That was the third time I dreamt of the same damn dream! What the hell is wrong with me? Why can't I just fall asleep! I'm so tired, and tomorrow is going to be a big day. My heart began to beat faster just thinking about it.

"Santana?" I glanced to my right, seeing Sam slowly lift his head off the pillow, trying so hard to open his eyes.

"Yeah?" I whispered.

"Go to sleep dude." He turned away from me and didn't say another word.

Yeah, I'm _trying_ to Sam. I haven't been waking up all night like a psycho for fun.

I positioned myself in the bed as comfortable as I could, and closed my eyes. But again, all I could think about was Brittany Pierce.

* * *

The second day of boot camp was like reliving yesterday. I'm staring at the same people, same crew, same camera men following me around every couple of minutes, and my stomach isn't happy.

I didn't get the amount of sleep that I hoped for, but that's normal. I'm just really nervous. I honestly really want this so bad. I can't let anything hold me back now. Except that the only thing I can concentrate on is Brittany Pierce. The way she showed up in every one of my dreams last night, the way she comforted me, and kissed me. It's what pretty much kept me awake. All I could think about was how _lucky_ I was that she's even rooting for me to win this thing. And I _do_ need to win this this. For so so so many reasons.

"Excuse me, Miss Santana?"

I turned at the sound of my name and saw a young camera guy, calling me.

"Yes?"

"Can I interview you really quickly for the show?"

I nodded, and stood from the chair that I was sitting on to walk in front of the camera man. Right now all the X Factors round 1 boot camp winners were backstage getting ready to be face to face with the judges. Except, this time, we have to have a sing off with another contestant. I was picked to sing with a girl name CeCe Frey. A tanned, toned, brunet that paints cheetah prints on the side of her face. She can be a little bit of a drama queen, but I pretty much put her in her place, and now we can tolerate each other a little more.

In some way, she reminds me of the way I was in high school. So sure of herself, confident, beautiful, talented, and bitchy. Yes I can be a bitch here and there, but I've grown a lot since I lost my family. People say I should be even angrier, but… I'm not.

"How are you feeling about this whole thing?" The camera man asked after he got his camera ready, snapping me from my thoughts.

"I'm feeling really confident." I lied.

"Who are you partnered to do a sing off with?"

"CeCe Frey." I nodded, with a little smile.

The camera guy stopped the recording and put his camera to the side. "Hey, can you please answer with like a sentence?" he asked.

"Oh, yeah yeah. I'm sorry." I shook my head in embarrassment. They always have to remind me to put my answers in complete sentences because then it won't make sense when the viewers watch it.

"Okay, cool." The camera guy positioned his camera right again and began recording. "Who are you partnered to do a sing off with?"

"I'm partnered to do a sing off with CeCe Frey." I clapped my hands together softly and smiled.

"How do you feel about that?"

"I feel good… She's a very talented girl. I uh…- It's a little bit tense because we're both going for the same thing, so… the competition is definitely there."

"What song are you girls going to sing?"

"We are going to sing Secrets, by One Republic. I didn't really want to sing that song but we flipped on it, and she won, so…" I shrugged

"Are you girl's good friends now?"

Good friends? We just met, weirdo.

I laughed inside, and shook my head softly, "I'm here to win, not necessarily here to make friends. Now is the time to make it to the next round, and that's what I'm going to try my hardest to do." I remarked

"What would winning this mean to you?"

What would winning this mean to me?... Let's see. I would get the five million dollar check, get a recording contract. I'll have money, Puck, Sam and I would be living stupendously. Maybe Brittany Pierce and I can be really good friends due to it. And most importantly, it'll give me hope in getting my family back.

I felt my eyes start to burn, and my trough close up. "It would mean the world." I choked out.

The camera guy stopped recording again, and put his camera down. "Thank you, that was really good. I got everything I need." He said, sympathetically.

I still felt my eyes burning and I know I had tears threatening to come out. I nodded to him and walked to the closest bathroom. I need Sam. I need Puck. I need them to tell me it'll all be okay. That I can beat CeCe, cause she's just a little brat. A really talented brat, but I can do it.

I entered the bathroom, and silence took over my ears. Finally some peace and quiet. Seems like everyone is out there getting prepared, and practicing, while I'm over here crying about my damn family! I smacked the sink, and stared at myself in the mirror in front of me. I had my curls loosely down, and was wearing a beautiful tight, red dress, but still… I looked so broken. How could I let this happen? I'm making myself look so weak in front of all those people! I'm the best one here! Brittany Pierce said it herself. Before she kissed me, and why did she have to kiss me? Why does she have to keep on showing up in my dreams? She's the one who's doing this to me! I can't concentrate cause of her! Because all I seem to do is think about her face, and the way I catch her stare at me, and how she laughs at the things I say when no one ever does.

I quickly cleaned myself up, and waited until I was sure not to break again to go back outside.

People were already starting to perform, so I sat back down in my chair and began to practice before it was CeCe's and I have to go up.

Most of the performers had already done their sing off, and of course I was one the last ones. I practiced and I practiced. I have this song in the bag. Just on cue, one of the crew members found me and politely told me it was time. My heart began to race and I suddenly got this big adrenaline rush. I gathered my belongings and was led to the side of the auditorium.

I saw the man who had led me here listening closely to his ear piece, waiting for the cue to let me walk to the stage. On the other side of the auditorium I saw CeCe starting at me. When she caught my eyes on her, she smirked. If she thought that would intimidate me, she's so wrong. Just for that smirk, I'm going to murder her out there.

"Okay go ahead." The man tapped my shoulder and I walked to the center of the stage never removing my eyes from CeCe, until she finally backed down and looked away.

"Oh oh. It's show time." I heard L.A. say softly.

When we both arrived in the center, we both turned to face the judges.

I saw all of them look really amused with us for some reason. As if they know something is going to go down right now. I saw the cameras all facing us, so I tried to show less of my nervousness and more of my attitude.

"This is it. The last two." Simon announced, smiling.

"The grand finale." I joked with shaky hands.

"It is the grand finale. You look great by the way. Both of you." Simon complimented.

"Thank you very much." We both said in unison, and I felt her stare at me.

"Okay. So girls how did you end up choosing the song?"

"We flipped for it, and I won." CeCe answered. I gave her an amused look, and she caught me. "I just thought we could do so much with that song."

The judges started writing something down in the journal in front of them. Simon finished and looked back up to us. "Okay. Santana, I'm going to start with you. Why do you feel you should win this competition?"

Awe Shit.

Here I go again with the burning of my eyes, and closing of the trough.

Fuck.

I tried to shake it off, and took a deep breath. I kept the microphone over my mouth ready to say something but nothing ever came out. "I-I don't fit anywhere else except for under the spot light." I croaked. I saw some of them nodding their heads in understanding. "I'm tired of seeing all these artists do things that I know I can do. And I know," I closed my eyes, "I hope that my family will be finally be proud of me." I felt a tear escape and I quickly wiped it off. "I'm sorry I don't mean to cry."

"It's all right. It's okay." Simon reassured, smiling at me. "Alright CeCe?"

I took a quick glance toward Brittany Pierce and when she caught my eye she smiled sympathetically at me. Great. Now she's going to take back everything she said and think I'm a weak ass loser. I turned my attention to CeCe, not returning a smile back to her.

"I wanna succeed as much as I want to breathe. I want this like the very oxygen that's in my lungs. I'm coming out here and I'm fighting for it. I don't know if you believe in me yet," she quivered. "But I will make a believer out of you, and I will not leave this competition until each and every one of you believes that I am your winner."

I shook my head at how fucking badass that sounded. _I_ sounded like such a sap! This is- wow. This is just great.

The judges stayed quiet, until Simon finally spoke up. "Okay," he whispered. "Thank you both. Let's do it."

I took a deep breath and nodded.

The auditorium was silent. The only thing I could hear was my very own heartbeat. I closed my eyes as the track started playing. This is it. Either I knock this out of the park or I'm out of the game. It was a soft piano acoustic version of the song, so it was going to show them a whole different side of my voice now.

"_I need another story. Something to get off my chest_…" CeCe started singing the beginning like we had planned. She sounded pretty good, but I could tell she was really nervous.

Again I glanced at the judges and they all had their eyes fixed on CeCe. I took a glimpse of Brittany Pierce, and saw how concentrated she was. Then suddenly she fixed her eyes on me. I quickly glanced down.

Britney Spears was making a weird face expression that I couldn't really read, but then again she always does weird face expressions.

"_I'm gonna give all my secrets away_…" she yelped the last word.

My turn was coming any second now. And my stomach was doing crazy flips. I took a deep breath, and closed my eyes.

"_Ohhhh! I got no reason, got no say. Got no family I could blame_…" I began singing strong. I felt chills go down my whole body. I opened my eyes and saw CeCe wasn't staring at me, she was staring at the ground instead. I turned to the judges and focused my eyes on Brittany Pierce. Fuck it. "_Tell me what you want to hear! Something that would like those ears!_..." I saw Brittany maneuver in her seat. She didn't want to look at me. I was giving my heart and soul into this performance. Singing with so much passion. Telling myself over, and over how my life could change just by this small performance. "_I'm gonna give all my secrets away_!" and like CeCe, I yelped the last word… but better.

I brought the microphone down, and waited patiently for them to dismiss us.

"Thank you girls." Simon nodded.

"Thank you" We said in unison and walked off the stage.

As we got to the end of the stage, a camera man was waiting for us.

"How did you feel you did?" he asked.

We both stayed quiet, not knowing who was going to answer first. So I spoke up. "I feel good about it. That song was great. Thanks for picking it out CeCe."

She turned to me and we both gave each other a fake smile, which made me laugh.

"I feel really good about it as well. We'll just have to see what happens." She said, smiling to the camera.

The camera man nodded, and let us pass through.

I went straight for my chair, while CeCe walk off in another direction. I sat down and replayed my performance. It was good. It was really good. I wish Sam and Puck got to see it, so they can tell me otherwise.

An hour went by when the crew finally called the young adults back to the stage. I saw Quinn walking not too far away from me. I haven't really talked to her since the other day, and in a way I kinda feel weird about her being in my dream as well. She was horrible.

It was too late to ignore her, because just as I was about to look away she caught my eyes on her. She beamed and walked towards me.

"Hey. How did you do?" she asked hooking her left arm with my right.

I glanced at our arms and looked away. "I did pretty good. How about you? Who did you compete with?"

"Julia Bullock." She made an angry face. "She was so good! But I think I did pretty well myself."

"That's good."

We walked up the stairs and onto the stage. Quinn unhooked her arm and stood next to me. I glanced around and saw CeCe was somewhere near the end of the line, seeming as nervous as ever. There's about 16 of us lined up right now, and only a couple of us will get picked to move on in the competition.

Everyone was silent. I was going out of my mind. All of these people are so talented; they all deserve to be here. If they don't call my name, I don't know what I'm going to do.

I took a peak at Brittany Pierce but she wasn't looking at me. She doesn't believe in me anymore.

I took my attention to Simon when he cleared his trough. "Out of this group, six of you are going to make it through to the next round of this competition. First person through to the judges home is…" he paused. Staring at each and every one of us. The suspense was killing me! Please let it be me. Please. "CeCe Frey."

My heart dropped. My breath hitched, and my jaw began to quiver. "Oh my god." I whispered, with watery eyes.

The people around me began to clap for her, so I started too as well.

I heard CeCe crying, as she began walking pass me off the stage. I didn't want to look at her, cause my whole world was crumbling down at this very second.

"The next person through to the next round is…" L.A paused as well, observing all of us. "Willie Jones."

Everyone around me began clapping again and I saw Willie, a black country singer, running around in excitement, crying.

All I could think about is how lucky Willie is right now. I bet he's feeling so good, while I feel like shit.

Also going through to the judges homes, is…" Britney Spears began. "Jennel Garcia."

Jennel was standing on my left side, and began to cry instantly. Jennel and I were pretty cool with each other so I wrapped my arms around her and congratulated her, while everyone else began clapping. "Congratulations." I whispered, and she nodded, still crying as she walked off the stage.

"Next going through to the judges homes is…" Brittany Pierce began. She was staring at me and my heart began to race. Is she going to say my name? She never took her eyes away from me as she said, "Quinn Fabrey."

Quinn instantly latched on to me crying as I kept my eyes on Brittany. She never looked away either. It's like we were trying to read each other's expression. I couldn't read hers but I'm sure she could read mine. Quinn let go and walked off the stage.

I lost all hope.

"So we're down to two places left." L.A. announced. Next person to go through the judges homes is…" he paused. And in that pause, all I could think about is Sam and Puck. They came all the way over here with me, believing in me. And it's all for nothing. I felt tears suddenly began to fall from my eyes. "It's Jullian Jensen."

I closed my eyes, and never wanted to open them. I just wanted to walk off this stage and give all the judges a big huge 'Fuck you'. Fuck you for getting my hopes high! And Brittany, you told me I was good. You told me I could win this whole thing! Yet I'm still here! I've lost hope. Thank you so much X Factor for embarrassing me in front of everyone.

"The final place goes too…" Brittany Pierce began. She had her head down, and I… I was lost. Once she lifted up her head I saw she had the biggest smile on her face, which made my heart skip, "Santana Lopez." Brittany boasted.

My heart stopped.

I brought my hands over my mouth in disbelief as I felt my tears falling. I felt numb. I heard the other contestants clapping for me, and I didn't know what to do. I couldn't stop crying. I glanced again to the judge's tables thanking them, and saw Brittany do a fist pump towards me. I laughed while I was still crying, and I began walking off the stage with shaky legs. I made it. My family is going to see this, and they're going to be so proud of me! Michael is going to love me again! I was so excited! I couldn't wait to tell Puck and Sam. I began running to the room where they kept all the family and friends in waiting, as fast as I could in these heels. But before I even got far, a camera man was waiting for me.

I stopped and tried to catch my breath. I began wiping away all my tears, "Congratulations! How do you feel?"

I didn't know what to say! I still haven't gotten back all my breath but I still answered, "I feel. Amazing." I ran my hands through my hair, and shook my head, still not believing I'm moving on.

"We're you scared they weren't going to call you?"

"Hell yes!" I answered truthfully, "I was dying not knowing if I was going to stay or go home."

"Well, now you're moving on. Feel good?"

I nodded crying again. "It feels amazing."

After he finally gave me the okay to leave, I began running again in search of my boys. I saw some parents outside of the room congratulating the other winners. Quinn was there and she yelled when she saw me.

"You made it!" She ran towards me, and gave me a huge hug.

"I did!"

"This is so insane!" Quinn let go of her hold on me, and I began moving away.

"I know! But I have to tell my friends! I'll find you in a bit."

"Okay!" she smiled, and walked to the door of the room.

I peeked in through the small window and saw Puck and Sam looking super anxious and nervous. They were practically the only ones left there for the exception of two other parents. I guess the other contestants didn't bring anybody with them, which is sad.

I opened the door and saw both of them look my way, standing up.

"I'm through!" I announced, running to them.

"Yes!" Sam jumped in the air.

"Ohhhh shit, you're in!" Puck picked me up, and spun me around. When he put me down, Sam gave me a huge hug, and I saw that his eyes were extremely, suddenly, really red. I turned to Puck to tell him Sam was crying so we can make fun of him, but instead I saw Puck was already crying even more as well. Which made me cry. So we just stood there hugging each other, crying our eyes out.

"I'm in."

* * *

Review! Let me know what you think!:) Btw. Okay. No Quinntana-_-


	5. Chapter 5

Twenty. There are currently twenty palm trees in front of my L.A., two story house. The only reason I know this is because I've been starring, nervously for the past half hour out my window hoping to see a long black limo drive up to my drive way. I'm honestly a nervous wreck. I know I shouldn't be, I mean I'm supposed to be the most self-confident, emotional competence blonde who everyone wants to be… Well according to Seventeen Magazine I am. But lately, I've been feeling out of my game. I have no idea what my emotions are most of the time, and it's driving me insane! And it's not like I can just go up to someone and talk to them about it, because they'll think I've finally gone crazy. And maybe I have. All I know is that I can't stop thinking about _her_. And it's wrong. It's so wrong! I've never felt this way about a _woman_ before. What would people think? Will my fans dislike me?... What am I saying?! It's not like I'm going to do anything about it. I can't. I can't do _anything_ about it. Maybe that's the reason why my bones want to jump out of my skin right now, because what if I can't control myself? What if I say something, or worst _do_ something? It's just getting harder and harder, and I'm just…scared.

"Britt stop biting your nails."

I jumped at the sudden voice entering my room. "Kurt" I breathed out, resting my hand on my chest. "What are you doing here? Ar-are they here?"

Kurt eyed me carefully as he closed the door to my room. "No not yet." He shook his head, and I brought my attention back to counting nothing outside. "Britt are you okay? You've been acting really distant lately. You should tell me if something is wrong." I said nothing, continuing to stare out my window. "Is it Taylor? Is he calling again?"

I turned to Kurt with my eyebrows furrowed, shaking my head. "What? No Kurt, everything is fine." I smiled at him in reassurance. "I'm just a little nervous about this whole competition, and having to send people home, and you know, it's normal to be nervous, right?"

"Oh, yeah yeah of course it is." He nodded.

"Yeah I'm just- yeah." I nodded, smiling, walking away from my window and sitting down on my huge California King bed.

"You're going to do great Britt. And Rachael is on her way right now to be right by your side."

I let out a deep breath, "Okay good." I felt myself begin to relax. "Okay so, how do I do this?"

"Do what?"

"Like what am I supposed to do when my group arrives? Am I going to have to be with them like all the time?" I asked.

"No, no. All you have to do is go say hi to them, introduce Rachael as your guest mentor, and then let them do their thing. I'll go get you a script of what you need to say to them in a bit, but yeah that's mostly it. Piece of cake, right?"

"Yeah a piece of cake sounds really good right now." I nodded.

Kurt laughed, and began walking to the door. "I'm going to go get you that script just so you can be ready. I believe they should be arriving in about 10 minutes or so."

My heart began to race again. "Okay." I got up and walked back to my window.

"Oh and Britt?

I turned to him again. "Yeah?"

"Uhm, the show producer actually wanted me to talk to you about something."

I gave him a confused look, "Okay, about what?"

"Well… we all know that Santana Lopez is probably the best contestant on the show," I froze and I actually began to listen, "They think that most of the viewers are apparently watching just to see how far she goes, which I believe is correct. What the producers want you to do is be a little tougher on her. They want you to make it seem like you won't pick her to be on your top 4."

"Wait, what? Why would they want me to do that for?"

"It makes for good TV." Kurt shrugged.

"But how the hell am I going to do that Kurt?" I barked. "She's the best one hands down, she's… she's amazing. How am I going fool everyone that I don't want her to be in my top 4?"

"You're just going to have to put on your acting mode and go with the flow. When the camera is on you and she's performing, just act like something is off, and make little comments here and there. Don't worry, you'll do fine. It's just something the producers want you to do." Kurt smiled, and walked out the door.

Great. Now the whole world _is_ going to think I'm crazy. How on earth do the producers think I can pull this off? God, I'm so stressed already and it hasn't even begun.

I picked up my phone and got on twitter. I had a bunch of tweets from my fans asking if I was excited to see my group again, and others asking who I thought was going to win this whole thing. Some were even tweeting that _I_ knew Santana Lopez was winning this whole thing. My fans know me too well. And now I can't say anything! Damn producers.

_**Young Adults on their way to my house! Let's get this show on the road. Who do you guys think will make it to my top 4? #excited #tellme**_

I sent the tweet and began biting my nails again. I can't help it, it's a nervous habit.

"Hellooo?" There was a knock on the door, and Rachel's head popped in.

"Rachel!" I exclaimed, racing to her. "Oh my god! I'm so happy you're here! I'm going crazy!" I exaggerated, hugging her.

"I'm happy to be here! I've missed you!" she said hugging me back. "It's been too long!"

I sighted, "It has! I've missed you so much."

She let me go, keeping that huge smile on her face and took a good glance at me. "Still keeping that figure, huh?" she said playfully.

I laughed, "Gotta keep my fans interested." I joked, shrugging.

She giggled, "I love it! How are you? How crazy has all this been? Thank you again for picking me to be your guest mentor." She said, bumping my shoulder.

"Of course! Who else would I pick other that _the_ Rachel Berry?" I winked.

She giggled, "It really _is_ good to see you Brittany. Everything has been so hectic lately and it just feels good to see some familiar faces."

"Same here. I really didn't think this was going to be _this_ hard, but it is." I pouted.

"Really? I would think its all fun and what not. I mean come on, sitting and judging next to Britney Spears! That's insane."

"That _is_ pretty crazy. She's actually really funny though, I love talking to her."

"Yeah, she seems really lovely."

"Have you met her?"

"I did once, but I don't think she'll remember." Rachel laughed.

"Yeah," I giggled. "She goes hard on the alcohol."

Rachel nodded, "She really does."

There was a knock and we both turned to the door. A man, who if I'm not mistaken is one of the camera men, came in. "You girls ready? Your group is here Brittany."

My heart sped up, and I felt my stomach do twists and turns. "Wait, what? No Kurt told me he was giving me a script or something and he never did. Are they really here already?"

"Yes mam. They're waiting for you in the living room. Here's what we're going to do, there's no time to read a script so you're just going to welcome them on your own, and just introduce Miss. Rachel Berry. They don't know she's here so we'll let you go in first and Rachel will be waiting for your cue in the hall way. Any questions?"

I blinked. "I have to go right now? Like… already?" I asked nervously.

The camera man looked a little frustrated but I could tell he was trying his hardest to be professional. "Yes mam."

I nodded, taking a deep, shaky breath. "Okay," I turned to Rachel and saw she was already walking to the door with an ecstatic look on her face. I rested my shaky hand on her shoulder, "Rachel don't be nervous, okay?"

We got to the end of the hall way. The living room where my group was stationed in was just around the corner. This is it.

One of the camera men got my attention and signaled me the go ahead. I turned to Rachel as she smiled at me, giving me a thumps up before I rounded the corner. I felt an adrenaline rush. I'm going to have to pick 4 people. I'm going to have to send two very talented people home. Why did I agree to do this again?

I walked in the living room, but kept my head down until I heard the six people in my group get up and begin cheering loudly.

"Hey guys." I waved, smiling at how happy they all looked right now. And of course once I spotted _her_ I had to try my hardest to not keep glancing up at her already.

"Oh my god, oh my god!" CeCe shouted running to hug me first. After her it was just one hug after the other.

"This is insane! I'm so happy right now." Jillian murmured when she hugged me. It was so cute. It actually made me feel so bubbly inside. Santana's hug never came though. When I finally spotted her she opened her arms to me. And my heart almost failed me.

"Hi!" Santana shyly squealed, hugging me.

The way she was holding me, the way she smelled, the way we fit so perfectly together made me not want to let her go, but I instead kept it short and made it seem like it was any other hug to me. If only she knew.

I stepped a couple feet away from them, like they had told me I should, and smiled. "Are you guys excited?" I squealed excitedly. I was excited! Seeing them here at my house, and how happy they all looked, it made me relax a little. I actually don't even know why I was so nervous.

"Super excited!" they all practically said in unison. I saw Quinn Fabray lock arms with Santana, happily holding on to her. And now I remember why I was nervous.

I quickly looked away, and clapped my hands together. "Okay! Wow I'm so excited that you're here right now… at my house!" I emphasized. They all started cheering and saying things that I couldn't really catch because all I was trying to do is _not_ focus on Quinn's arm on Santana right now. No, no, no I can't be feeling like this! "I know you guys have been working really, really hard, but you guys are just going to have to step it up a notch." I said starring at Santana. "There are six of you and I can only take four. So take a look around you. That's your competition." I hinted. "I promise you that I will devote everything to you guys, and I'm going to teach you _with_ the help of a really good friend of mine. She's sold over twenty million records, and is practically my idol." I giggled, "So please welcome my friend…" I lingered, swaying excitedly at them. "Rachel Berry!"

On cue Rachel came out strutting, with that smile of hers. I honestly don't know how she does it. My group went crazy.

"Holy shit its Rachel Berry! Oh my God, Oh my God!"

"No way!"

"Hey everybody." Rachel waved, smiling excitedly at them. "I'm so very excited to be here with you all!" She boasted. My group was still going crazy, not believing Rachel was standing in front of them right now. I saw Santana had her hand over her mouth in shock and Quinn was _still_ holding on to her. "So you guys have come a long, long way. I congratulate all of you. _Today_ is a very important day though. You've got to go out there and give it your all, cause there's only four of you that Brittany can take." I nodded, concentrating on Rachel talk. She's pretty good at this. "I'm here today to help get you to be the best that you can be. There are a lot of talented people here, but we need a superstar."

I turned to my group, and saw they were all trying to be serious. I glanced at Santana and saw her staring at me. I quickly looked away. "Yes," I chimed in. "And we're all pulling for you." From the corner of my eyes one of the camera men got my attention. He wanted us to wrap it up. Damn, already? "But, yeah I think it's best that you guys go get prepared. I really hope that you guys do amazing, I _know_ you're going to." I saw Santana all of a sudden seem really nervous, and I just wanted to go up to her and give her a hug. But I can't without it being weird. "And… I really just want to give all of you a hug!" I squealed, opening my arms to them. Smooth enough.

They all came running up to Rachel and I. I was staring at each one of them as they gave me a hug and it got me realizing that I have no idea who I'm going to send home. For sure not Santana, though I have to make it seem like I am. Again Santana wrapped her arms around me and I couldn't think anymore. It feels like somehow I've known her forever, but we're just really meeting now. I don't know what this feeling is; I've never had this happen to me before. It's curiosity, its admiration, attractiveness. She really is beautiful, with her long wavy, black hair flowing everywhere around me right now. I just... can't.

I backed away, "Okay guys well we'll leave you so you can get prepared. We'll see you guys later on."

"Yes, and bring all you got!" Rachel added, pointing at them. With that we rounded the corner and left the living room. I felt Rachel grab my arm, and jump excitedly. "They're so adorable! I feel like they're all my babies now."

I laughed. "They're _my_ babies."

"Well whatever, I'm helping you with this."

A camera man was following us as we walked out, and asked if he can ask us a few questions for the show.

"Yes of course." Rachel answered fixing her hair. "This is so much fun." She mumbled to me.

"Brittany, how are you feeling about having this category?"

"What do you mean category? As in… having the young adults?"

"Yes."

"Oh! I'm feeling really, really great about it. I think they're all talented, and it's the category I wanted. I'm so glad that it was given to me. Especially since if _I_ would have been competing in this competition, this is the age group I would be in. So yeah that's pretty cool."

"Miss. Rachel, what did you think about the group?"

Rachel grabbed her chest exuberantly, "They all seem so lovely. I've actually been keeping up with the show, since my good friend Brittany here is judging," she said grabbing my shoulder. "So I would like to think I know them already. And I'm not going to lie; I've already chosen a favorite." She giggled. "But I'm not going to say who!" she assured.

I gasped, "What? Who's your favorite?"

Rachel turned to me in amusement. "I'm not going to tell you!"

"It's okay, just tell me."

She laughed, "No, Britt."

"Brittany do you have a favorite?" The camera man asked.

"Nope."

"Really? Not one person in there stands out from everyone else?" Rachel interjected.

I turned to her wanting to tell her to shut it, but the camera man was waiting, and was pointing the camera at me. "No really. I think they all have an even chance right now and they really need to give it their all today. From there, I will pick the best four performances."

"_We_ will pick." Rachel corrected.

"We will pick." I nodded, smiling at the camera.

"Rachel, everyone wants to know how you do it to look so good all the time. Can you let them know on the secret?"

Oh, God. Here we go.

Rachel beamed, giggling. "How sweet! Honestly I think living in New York the past nine months has really kind of opened my eyes up as to pushing the limits, fashion wise, and you know it's an incredibly fashion, conscious city and I just try to keep up." Rachel shared.

The camera man nodded, and put his camera down. "Thank you so much lady's, that was great."

"Thank you." We both said in unison.

Rachel and I continued to walk down the hall until we saw Kurt pop out from one of the rooms.

"Santana!" He shouted, jogging to us. "Here's the script." He said out of breath, handing me a paper.

"A little late Kurt."

"I'm so sorry Brittany. I was on my way but then I-"

Our attention was suddenly cut off by the door Kurt had come out of, opening, and reviling a very short out of breath boy who I believe is named Blaine. He's one of the camera men.

"Oh." We all became very still, and quiet.

"Well hello there." Rachel greeted.

I could tell Blaine didn't know what to do. "Hi." He greeted back fixing his collar. "How's everyone doing today?"

"Oh well you know, just… peachy."

Blaine nodded, "Great, great." He said clapping his hands together. "Well. It was nice to meet you. I have to go-" He pointed past us to the end of the hallway. "Over, there."

He walked passed us in a hurry, and I couldn't help but laugh. "Kurt! What is wrong with you?" I asked amused, pushing his shoulder playfully.

"What? I didn't do anything!"

"Liar! Tell me you were _both_ not just in there with nothing on." I enthused.

He contemplated before answering. "It's not true that we had nothing on. We had the radio on."

Rachel and I burst out laughing. "Wow. That is just- wow."

"Kurt he is so cute!" Rachel admitted.

"Only kind I know Rachel." Kurt giggled, winking at us.

"I've taught you well."

"That you did."

* * *

An hour or so passed and Rachel and I were told we had to talk to each contestant one by one, and give them some advice. All I could think about is having to talk to Santana and telling her all this crap about things that she honestly doesn't even have to worry about. I mean, what if I tell her these things and she just doesn't have any more confident about herself? What if I ruin everything for her? I don't even have a clue about what to say. She doesn't have to fix anything. She's perfect.

I saw Kurt talking to one of the crew members, so I got up from my chair, and walked up to him. He saw me and excused himself from the guy he was talking to. "What's wrong?"

"Kurt. I have no idea what I'm going to tell Santana. What do I tell her? I need you to tell me what to tell her."

"Okay, calm down. I've been thinking about it, and maybe you could just tell her something about maybe her attitude?"

"Her attitude is awesome."

"To _us_ it is, but sometimes it can come off the wrong way to other people."

I stayed quiet, thinking about it. "That's like the craziest suggestion ever. No, I'm not going to say that."

"Okay! We need Rachel and Brittany. The contestants are in their room. We'll go to each contestant after the other. You lady's ready?"

"Yes." I heard Rachel chime in as I walked away from Kurt and simply nodded.

I was annoyed.

"Okay follow me. The first person you're going to talk to is Jennel Garcia." He explained as we followed behind him. After you're done with her, look for me, and I'll lead you to the next contestant. Oh and try to not be there for more than a minute. We have to keep this going fast."

"Sounds simple enough."

"Okay lady's in through there." He pointed and we continued to walk until we saw Jennel with her headphones on practicing her song. When she saw us, she quickly took off her headphones and greeted us.

"Hi." She said a little shyly.

"Hello." Rachel and I both said in unison as we sat down in the seat next to her. "How's it going?

"Good." She sang out.

"Good. We just wanted to give you like a little advice before you go out there." I informed her, and I swear I wanted to laugh so hard in this moment, cause her face expression right now Is priceless. "You know you have such incredible stage presence, and I know that when I get nervous I tend to overdue a certain movement from time to time. And I can tell when you get a little nervous cause you- you do this thing with your hair," she laughed. "You flip it!"

"Yeah I do, do that." She gave a nervous giggle.

"Yeah you know just a little bit will be enough." Rachel added.

"Okay," She nodded. Rachel and I thought that was enough for her, so we got up. "Thank you."

"Yeah, no problem. We'll see you in a bit." I said as I touched her shoulder and walked out of the room.

We did this back to back. Contestant after contestant, and I was just waiting for the moment I got to see Santana again. I can just imagine her face when I tell her she will be in my top 4, and all the time that I will get to spend with her I just- I can't wait.

We had two more people to go. Quinn and Santana.

The crew member lead us to the next room, where we saw Quinn jump out of her seat, and put her headphones on the table. "Hi!"

"Hello." I greeted and went in for her hug. She actually smelled really good. Maybe that's why Santana is always clung to her.

"Hi, how are you? I want a hug too." Rachel said playfully, receiving a hug from Quinn.

We all sat down in a round table. "Well Quinn, here we are. I'm excited to be able to mentor you, cause… you really are wonderful singer." I admitted smiling.

Quinn blushed, "Thank you."

"But I just wanted to give you a couple of notes, and a little advice. I think that you have and incredible voice. When I watch your performance's it's not just about the voice, when you perform it's also about how you carry yourself when you're on stage. You know, your facial expressions when you sing. Just don't let it mess up your performance, just keep that in mind, cause you have really stiff competition here."

Quinn nodded, seriously.

"Yeah just go out there and give it your all. Everything you've prepared yourself for is meant for this day." Rachel added smiling.

Quinn nodded again. "Okay, thank you."

"No problem." Rachel smiled, and turned to me to see if I had anything else to say. I didn't.

We got up, said goodbye, and left. My heart began to race knowing who we were about to talk to next. Again we were led by the crew member, and he motioned us to the last room we have to go into today. I took a deep breath and walked in.

There she was, sitting in a chair, mouthing the words to a song that was playing through her headphones. When she saw us walk in, she slowly put them down, with a huge smile on her face.

That smile is going to kill me. _This_ is going to kill me.

"Hi." I greeted, smiling. She got up from her chair and walked up to me.

"Hi." She giggled a little before she hugged me.

Again. I never wanted to let go.

"Hi there! Well look at you looking all beautiful." But then again, Rachel was here, and she had to ruin everything.

I let go of Santana and she hugged Rachel.

"Thank you. You don't look too bad yourself." Santana commented back.

Rachel laughed, "Thank you." She motioned to the chair, "Sit."

We all sat down, and I felt like I couldn't speak anymore. I felt Santana's eyes on me, and I just wanted to confess everything I've been feeling. I wanted to ask her if she's ever felt this way about a woman before, or if maybe she feels a little something for me. Which is crazy! I can't do that!

I cleared my trough, "How are you?"

"I'm doing okay. A little freaked out about everything." She admitted, nervously playing with her hands. "How are _you_?"

"Believe it or not, I feel the same way." I nodded, and I found myself just staring into her eyes.

I felt Rachel's eyes go from me, to Santana, to back to me. "Well…" Rachel trailed off snapping me awake. "We just wanted to come over here and have like a quick chat with you."

I quickly looked away from Santana and remembered I'm on a mission. "Yes. We came here to give you some advice." I gave her a bleak expression when I saw the camera was on me. "Unfortunately, I'm going to have to send two really, really talented people home, and it breaks my heart that I have too." She nodded seriously, and I had to look away. Her face is just beautiful. Like _she's_ beautiful. The kind of beautiful that makes you stop walking and get hit by traffic. "So. I just wanted to remind you that, when you perform…-" Wow. I have no idea what to say right now. Shit. Shit. Shit. What do I say? "When you perform… you have a lot of confidence. Like… you've got the whole attitude thing down." Oh great. "You've got the… sassiness; you've got the rock star quality in you. And sometimes…it borders a little unlikable to people." Oh God, here it goes. She gave me a quizzical look, and I gave her a wistful glance.

I turned to Rachel and she was giving me a confused look. I wiped the sweat I felt build up in my forehead and was about to continue when Santana cut me off. "I-uhh." She began, giving out a nervous laugh. It seemed like she wanted to say so much but it just wouldn't come out. I saw her eyes begin to tear up, and I just wanted to shoot myself. "I just… I have a lot going on right now." She whispered. "I'll admit I- I do hide behind all this." She said pointing to her attire. "I…-"she trailed off again. I could tell this was so hard for her right now.

"All of this emotion, right now, is what's opening you up. If you can put emotion into your performance, and people can see how vulnerable you can get, that's what's going to set you apart." She glanced up at me, with sad, tired, wet eyes, and I just didn't know what to do with myself anymore.

"It's true." Rachel commented and we both glanced at her. "If you put all your emotion with what's going on into your performance's _and_ also keep that attitude when the time is right, you'll be unstoppable."

Santana sniffled, and nodded.

"I'm excited to see you perform." I said softly, giving her a sad smile, before I got up.

"We'll see you out there." Rachel added, before we walked out the room, and I could finally breathe again.

I kept on walking trying to get my breath back to normal. My hands were shaking like crazy, and don't even get me started on how fast my heart is beating right now.

"What the hell was that?"

"God that was the hardest thing I had to do."

Rachel was still giving me a confused look. "How did you know to say that? To get all her emotion out like that?"

"Huh?"

"You were so good in there, Britt."

"I was?"

"Yes! I'm pretty amazed by you right now."

"Rachel. I had no idea what I was talking about. That was really hard." I admitted, still trying to catch my breath.

"Well you sure pulled it off. It seemed like you knew exactly what you were saying."

"Are you kidding? I kept on stuttering!"

"I know, what happened? You seemed fine with everyone else."

I took a deep breath and got my act together. Instead of answering her I continued to walk away.

* * *

Right now all the contestants are still trying to prepare their song, trying to perfect it cause this is their last chance to prove to me. My heart is racing just thinking about having to tell someone they have to leave, but it's what I have to do.

I had a couple of minutes left before the whole performances started. So I took out my phone and decided to do a question and answer with my fans.

_**Couple of minutes left till performance time. Question and Answer. Go!**_

I sent the tweet and waited for the all the answers.

"Are you nervous?"

I looked up to Rachel's awaiting eyes, and nodded. "Very nervous."

"I am as well. But, it will be fine. Don't worry about it too much. I'll be there with you."

"I honestly don't know what I would of do if you weren't here."

"You would've done great, Britt." She assured me smiling.

"Thanks." I smiled back. I checked my phone and already saw a bunch of tweets sent out to me. I always get excited when I get a chance to communicate with my fans. They get a little crazy sometimes, but I love them so much. I would be _no one_ without them.

"What are you doing?" Rachel asked curiously.

"I'm doing a question and answer with my fans." I replied, scrolling down all the questions.

"Awe really? I've never done one before."

I gasped, "Why not? It's so much fun!"

"I never have time!"

"Well you have time now. Come on, you can help me answer." I gestured her over to the seat next to me.

"Okay." She said excitedly. "So what do you do or what?"

"Well they ask you questions and you answer." I said it as if it was the most obvious question ever.

"Okay smartass, I get that, but why do you keep scrolling down. Why don't you just pick one?"

"Because… sometimes they ask really personal questions and I don't like answering those kinds, so I try to look for some funny questions, or questions that are really easy."

"Smart."

"I'm a genius." I shrugged.

"Okay, calm down."

I laughed, "Okay this is a good one. 'How does it feel to be the most desirable woman on the earth?'"

"Oh God, are you serious?" Rachel giggled.

"My fans are _dead_ serious." I huffed, as I typed out a tweet.

_**When you find out, let me know;)**_

I sent the tweet and continued to check for another question.

"That was a dumb answer."

"You're a dumb answer."

She shook her head and grabbed my phone so she can see the questions as well.

"Ha-ha look at this one. 'If I sent you an elephant where would you keep it?'"

_**My room. It's a toy elephant thought, right?**_

I laughed as I sent the tweet. They ask some weird questions some times.

"Out of the Young Adults who do you think will go the furthest?" Rachel read me the question.

"No, not that one."

"Why not? Just answer it. Everyone wants to know."

"Fine."

_**I think it's anyone's fair game right now.**_

"There." I pointed out as I sent the tweet.

"You're lame."

"Brittany, Rachel?" One of the crew members came up to us. "We're ready for you."

"Yay! I'm so ready to hear them sing!" Rachel chirped as she got up from her chair and followed the man.

I got up as well feeling really excited. Not that the hard part is done, all I have to do is sit back and relax.

The crew member led us back to the living room. The only people in the room were Rachel, I, the camera men, and the guitarist. The contestants were in the room next door, and were soon going to come out to perform, one by one.

"Okay ladies, when the contestants come in, ask how they are, and ask what song they're going to sing. That's all. We don't have a lot of time for anything else. When they're done, don't say good job, don't say a word of complement. Just say thank you or just nod. They'll know to walk out.

Rachel and I both nodded, "Okay." I whispered.

The first person to come out was Santana. She came in so gracefully, wearing a tight blue dress, and showing off her muscular toned legs.

I gulped, and smiled when she smiled. "Hi again."

"Hi." She said, giving a little wave.

"Do you feel ready?"

She nodded, "Yes. I just- I don't want to let you down."

My heart sank. I blinked I couple of times and felt my ears get red. Oh my God. Seriously, how can she have this effect on me?

"What are you singing?" Rachel asked.

She took in a deep breath. "I'm singing, Girl on Fire."

We both nodded. "Okay go ahead." Rachel allowed.

Thank God Rachel was here, because I honestly can't even move let alone talk.

The guitarist began strumming his guitar, and Santana's voice came into play. Her voice is just so perfect for this song. She actually sounds like Alicia Keys! How she hasn't already gotten a record deal, I will never know.

All the emotion that she was putting into this song right now, is giving me goose bumps all over my body. I'm so proud of her.

I tried so hard not to make anything out of her leering at me, but it's impossible! The way she stares at me is the way _I_ stare at her. There's something there, I know it.

"_She's just a girl and she's on fireee." _She stopped singing, and just stood there.

I wanted to clap. I wanted to run up to her and tell her she did so good! But I can't.

"Thank you, Santana." I said emotionless.

I could tell she was angry at herself for some reason, and she kept her head down as she walked out of the room.

"She thinks she blew it. But wow. She was amazing." Rachel whispered to me.

"She's incredible."

…

After all the contestants performed, Rachel and I had to decide who I was going to send home. This is honestly the hardest decision ever, because I love all of them! They're all _so_ good.

"Brittany, have you made a decision?" A crew member asked.

I turned to Rachel, and she nodded to me. "Yes, I'm ready."

I followed him back to the living room, alone, without Rachel this time. I could do this.

"You can just sit down right here, and we'll send each one of them one by one. Remember what to do?" He gave me a warning look.

"Yes."

"Okay then, bring the first contestant out." He mumbled in his earpiece.

I stayed there, sitting in the coach, alone playing with my hands. I was just thinking about what I was going to say to each one of them.

The first person to come out was Quinn Fabray. She looked like a lost child, looking for her mom. She seemed incredibly nervous, and I felt bad for her.

I stood up and gave her a hug, before letting her sit down. "You a little nervous?" I whispered.

She let me go and nodded, "Yeah."

We sat down and stayed quiet. "I just wanted to start off by saying… you have an incredible voice, there's no doubt about that. But… I have a few concerns. I feel as if you were really insecure with your performance? And, in order to be a Pop Star, the biggest thing is how you entertain people." I glanced at Quinn, and she seemed very despondent. "I've... made a decision." Quinn's eyes never left mine, searching for some reassurance, but I never gave it to her. "Quinn." She nodded. "You're in my top four." I said smiling.

"Oh my God!" she screamed, and covered her face with her hands. I'm pretty sure she was crying.

"This is a huge opportunity for you."

"I can't believe it." She said shaking her head, with tears in her eyes.

"Believe it." I said excitedly.

"Thank you so much, Brittany."

"Don't disappoint me."

"I won't, I promise I won't."

"Okay," I said smiling. I got up and she followed as well, giving me one last hug before she left.

…

I've already sent one person home and it was horrible! I never want to do it ever again! But then I again I have to cause I have one more left. The last two contestants are Jillian and of course Santana. Having to say goodbye to one of my group members was extremely hard, but telling the other group members they made my top four was amazing.

"Send in Santana." I heard someone speak in their earpiece.

My heart began to race, faster and faster.

I was playing with my hands when Santana came in. She had her hands locked together in front of her as she got closer to me. I know I wasn't supposed to, but a smile spread across my lips. I got up from my seat and gave her a hug.

"Hi, how are you?" I whispered.

"Terrified." She whispered back.

We let go, and I asked her to sit down. I began to prepared myself, remembering what I planned to say in my head.

I took a deep breath. "Santana."

She closed her eyes, "Yes?"

"You are… so extremely talented," I reached for her hand, I just felt like I needed to hold it for this. "Everyone can see that. I told you that it was going to be… _difficult_ trying to find a balance between, on fire, fierce with attitude, and a way where people can still relate to you." I stayed quit. "The problem is that this competition… is based on more than just incredible vocals." Santana dropped her head, and I continued to hold her hand. "Sometimes I have to make some really, really tough decisions." She sniffled and her shoulders began to shake.

I let her cry until she finally lifted up her head and i saw her eyes were extremely red. "I tried. _So_ hard." She said, looking straight into my eyes.

"Santana." I breathed out, shaking my head.

"Please don't do this." She begged with those crying, brown eyes.

"I've made my decision." She looked away from me and wiped away her tears. I waited for her to look at me, but she never did. "Santana?" She still didn't want to look at me. "Hey?" I pulled at her hand to get her attention. "Look at me." When she finally did, I gave her a sad, apologetic look. "You're in my top four." I smirked.

Her eyes bulged out, and she instantly began to cry. I couldn't help but smile at her. I grabbed her, pulling her up to her feet and hugged her so tightly. She wrapped her arms around me and continued to cry. I felt the cameras on us, and I didn't even care. In this moment it was just Santana, and I.

* * *

**What do you think?**


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